Yesterday, Pastor Benny Ho came over to preach, starting the first of the 4 part family life series.
I ( and I am sure many others ) was greatly blessed by his very interesting and useful sermon entitled What Makes Marriage Works.
I have to post the sermon points because I want to remember it clearly and do not want to be complacent in my marriage, which, according to pastor Benny is our 2nd most important decision after our faith. If we have a good marriage, we have a good life…
So here goes…
Preacher: Pastor Benny Ho
Date: 29 September 2013
Title: What Makes Marriage Works (Family Life Series 1/4)
Text: Ephesians 5:21-33
4 Observations
1) Marriage is built on the foundation of mutual submission (v21-22)
2) Submission is ultimately unto Christ NOT man (v22)
3) We are equal in standing, value, worth but not in function (Gal3:28) Man are wired to lead and woman are wired to follow
4) The bible focuses on responsibilities and not rights. Marriage is 100% each way and not 50% even if the other party is not doing their part. Because it is a covenant and not a contract. Ultimately it is unto the Lord. It is not just the coming of 2 worlds to become one. It is the forsaking of 2 worlds to form a new world.
Ephesians 5:31 Woman treat man as the head. Man treat woman as the body.
Man greatest need is to be honoured and respected. Woman greatest need is to be loved and feel secure. If we both do what the bible says our greatest needs are both being met.
Responsibilities of the wife (Ephesians 5:22-24)
Its counter cultural at that time of writing, so there is no cultural pressure/influence in the words being written
3 areas to watch
1) Attitude (1 Peter 3:1-6)
Continue to do what is right so that your partner can be won over. People respond to attitude. If your marriage is not in the ideal state, make sure our attitude is right with God (still)
2) Adaptability (Genesis 2:18)
3) Acceptance
Allow our pain to drive us to God but do not struggle in the place of desperation if life is in danger. Have acceptance first and work through problems.
Responsibilities of Husband (Ephesians 5:25-30)
1) Sacrificial love (V25)
Take dedicated time to romance our wife. Fill the tank. Guard our time with our time with our life
2) Sanctifying Love (v26)
We are responsible for our wives countenance (inner beauty/glow) when our wives are well inside spiritually, emotionally than it will reflect outwardly. Sanctify our wives with our prayers. Is our wives becoming more Christ like? Are our candles burning strongly for Christ after we come together?
3) Sustaining Love (v28)
Many marriages are not bad but they are no good also. God wants our marriage to have a sense of delight.
3 practical ways
1) Tell your wife “I love you” as often as we can. Wive can be forgetful so do remind them.
2) Do something nice for her regularly. Be as creative as you were while in courtship. You don’t do nice things because you feel romantic. You will feel romantic when you do nice things.
3) Choose to praise her continuously (proverbs 31:28-31) Affirmation is very important to our wife.
Conclusion: Meditate on the mystery of leaving of old world and cleaving with each other and fusing of a new world in the presence of God. In a wedding there are tears because of the leaving (children from parents) but there are also laughter because of the cleaving (husband and wife)
Spiritual parallel: Jesus leaving Heaven and cleave to us, His church and radiant bride.
12 magic words to keep our marriage going : I was wrong, I am sorry, Please forgive me, I love you.
After the sermon, I brought wifey down to respond to the alter call to recommit our marriage to Jesus once again. As we stood before His throne and prayed together, the tangible presence of the holy spirit envelops us and tears flowed freely.. bringing me back to the same place I stood 6 years ago where I held her hand and where our hearts were invisibly bounded by a vow that cannot be undone. Thank you Jesus for blessing me with Theresa, I will love her with all the love you have poured unto me so that her countenance will ever reflect your love, not mine.
I ( and I am sure many others ) was greatly blessed by his very interesting and useful sermon entitled What Makes Marriage Works.
I have to post the sermon points because I want to remember it clearly and do not want to be complacent in my marriage, which, according to pastor Benny is our 2nd most important decision after our faith. If we have a good marriage, we have a good life…
So here goes…
Preacher: Pastor Benny Ho
Date: 29 September 2013
Title: What Makes Marriage Works (Family Life Series 1/4)
Text: Ephesians 5:21-33
4 Observations
1) Marriage is built on the foundation of mutual submission (v21-22)
2) Submission is ultimately unto Christ NOT man (v22)
3) We are equal in standing, value, worth but not in function (Gal3:28) Man are wired to lead and woman are wired to follow
4) The bible focuses on responsibilities and not rights. Marriage is 100% each way and not 50% even if the other party is not doing their part. Because it is a covenant and not a contract. Ultimately it is unto the Lord. It is not just the coming of 2 worlds to become one. It is the forsaking of 2 worlds to form a new world.
Ephesians 5:31 Woman treat man as the head. Man treat woman as the body.
Man greatest need is to be honoured and respected. Woman greatest need is to be loved and feel secure. If we both do what the bible says our greatest needs are both being met.
Responsibilities of the wife (Ephesians 5:22-24)
Its counter cultural at that time of writing, so there is no cultural pressure/influence in the words being written
3 areas to watch
1) Attitude (1 Peter 3:1-6)
Continue to do what is right so that your partner can be won over. People respond to attitude. If your marriage is not in the ideal state, make sure our attitude is right with God (still)
2) Adaptability (Genesis 2:18)
3) Acceptance
Allow our pain to drive us to God but do not struggle in the place of desperation if life is in danger. Have acceptance first and work through problems.
Responsibilities of Husband (Ephesians 5:25-30)
1) Sacrificial love (V25)
Take dedicated time to romance our wife. Fill the tank. Guard our time with our time with our life
2) Sanctifying Love (v26)
We are responsible for our wives countenance (inner beauty/glow) when our wives are well inside spiritually, emotionally than it will reflect outwardly. Sanctify our wives with our prayers. Is our wives becoming more Christ like? Are our candles burning strongly for Christ after we come together?
3) Sustaining Love (v28)
Many marriages are not bad but they are no good also. God wants our marriage to have a sense of delight.
3 practical ways
1) Tell your wife “I love you” as often as we can. Wive can be forgetful so do remind them.
2) Do something nice for her regularly. Be as creative as you were while in courtship. You don’t do nice things because you feel romantic. You will feel romantic when you do nice things.
3) Choose to praise her continuously (proverbs 31:28-31) Affirmation is very important to our wife.
Conclusion: Meditate on the mystery of leaving of old world and cleaving with each other and fusing of a new world in the presence of God. In a wedding there are tears because of the leaving (children from parents) but there are also laughter because of the cleaving (husband and wife)
Spiritual parallel: Jesus leaving Heaven and cleave to us, His church and radiant bride.
12 magic words to keep our marriage going : I was wrong, I am sorry, Please forgive me, I love you.
After the sermon, I brought wifey down to respond to the alter call to recommit our marriage to Jesus once again. As we stood before His throne and prayed together, the tangible presence of the holy spirit envelops us and tears flowed freely.. bringing me back to the same place I stood 6 years ago where I held her hand and where our hearts were invisibly bounded by a vow that cannot be undone. Thank you Jesus for blessing me with Theresa, I will love her with all the love you have poured unto me so that her countenance will ever reflect your love, not mine.
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